The Tale of the Never-Ending (High Protein) Pizza Craving

Alright mate, lean in — I have to confess something. My top-tier comfort food is pizza, no question. But, at some point, a person does crave a bit more staying power in their snacks, right? Enter these High Protein pizza hot pockets. The first time I made them, it was mostly because my fridge contained quite literally nothing but odd cheeses, some leftover cooked chicken, and enough Greek yogurt to supply a small cafe. My teenager wandered into the kitchen, sniffed suspiciously, and then devoured three in ten minutes. That’s basically a win. And you know what? They’re surprisingly filling. Somewhere between a snack and a genuine meal — sort of like that one mate who always arrives at the pub a tiny bit overdressed for the occasion. You know who you are.

Why You’ll Love This (Trust Me, I’ve Tested It)

I whip up these pizza hot pockets when a regular slice just isn’t going to cut it (like after a long walk or, ahem, an emotionally taxing day of online shopping). My family goes wild for these because they taste like actual pizza but without the slump afterwards. The best bit? It’s all the cheese-pull goodness, but you can call them “protein-rich” and feel a bit smug. Don’t get me wrong — assembly does make a bit of a mess and I’m still picking flour out of weird places, but nothing compared to homemade bread days. And if you’ve ever made traditional calzones and wanted to shout at the dough, this method might just save what’s left of your sanity.

Here’s What You’ll Need (and What You Can Swap)

1 cup plain Greek yogurt (sometimes I sneak in skyr if it’s on sale — both work great)
1 1/2 cups self-raising flour (or, honestly, just regular plain flour with a teaspoon and a smidge of baking powder; my gran insisted on White Lily, but I use Aldi and I’m still here)
1/2 tsp garlic powder (skip if you want, but I rarely do)
1/2 tsp salt
1 1/2 cups shredded mozzarella cheese
1/2 cup cooked chopped chicken breast (or swap in turkey, or heck — last week I used leftover roast pork and it was amazing)
1/4 cup mini pepperoni (totally optional, or just use veggie pepperoni for a meatless day)
1/2 cup pizza sauce (I’ve been known to use barbecue sauce in a pinch. It’s… different)
1 egg for egg wash (or a splash of milk if eggs aren’t your jam, texture just gets a bit less shiny)
Pinch of Italian herbs or fresh basil if you’re feeling posh

Making ‘Em Happen: Actually, It’s Easier Than It Looks

Mix the Dough
Okay, plop your Greek yogurt and self-raising flour into a big bowl. Sprinkle in that salt and garlic powder. Grab a spoon, but ignore it halfway through and just knead with (clean!) hands. It’ll look weird and gunky at first, but it comes together. If it’s super sticky, add a spoonful more flour. Or, if you like living dangerously, just roll with it and flour your surfaces extra well.
Roll It Out
Chuck some flour onto your counter — or a giant chopping board if your kitchen’s tiny, like mine. Roll the dough to about the thickness of a pound coin (or a bit thicker if you like a doughier hot pocket, I won’t judge). Cut into 6 vaguely equal rectangles. I tend to eyeball it; perfectionism isn’t really on the agenda today, let’s be honest.
Load Up the Fillings
Honestly, this is my favorite part, probably because I sneak extra bits of cheese. Smear a little pizza sauce on half of each rectangle (don’t go too wild — soggy bottom alert!). Layer with chicken, cheese, pepperoni, and whatever herbs you fancy (I sometimes throw in olives if they’re loitering around). But save a bit of cheese for the top!
Fold and Seal
Fold the other half of dough over and press the edges to seal. I sometimes use a fork to crimp the sides so none of the good stuff escapes, but honestly, fingers work. If some cheese squeaks out, don’t stress. Just an extra snack for the pan.
Bake
Transfer your hot pockets to a lined baking tray. Brush the tops with a beaten egg (or milk if that’s what you’ve got). Sprinkle over a pinch more cheese if you’re really committed to the cause. Bake at 220°C (around 425°F, give or take) for 15–18 minutes, or until they’re puffed, golden, and smell like actual heaven.

Things I Learned the Hard Way (Read These!)

If your dough feels dry, it probably is — add a tablespoon of yogurt (I used to just ignore this and wound up with mini doorstops).
Let them cool a bit before biting in. I burnt my tongue more than once, which, yeah, nobody warned me about that.
It’s fine if the filling leaks; it’s not Instagram, it’s real life.

Variations I’ve Actually Tried

Veggie Delight: Swap chicken for roasted peppers and mushrooms. Actually, that’s now my meatless Monday go-to.
Breakfast Pockets: Scrambled eggs, ham, and cheddar — fantastic with a squirt of hot sauce. Once tried baked beans inside — not my finest hour.
Taco Style: Sub pizza sauce for salsa, chicken for ground beef. A bit messy, but tasty.

Gear I Use (But You Don’t Have to)

I have an ancient rolling pin that’s seen better days, but honestly, you can use a wine bottle or even your hands (bit rustic looking, but who cares). A parchment-lined tray saves cleaning, but foil works as a pinch-hitter.

How to Store Em (Not That They Ever Last Long)

You can keep these in the fridge for 2–3 days in an airtight box. They reheat well in the microwave or, even better, an air fryer if you’ve got one. Honestly, in my house, they rarely survive the afternoon. But if they do, better stash them, or someone else will.

How to Serve ‘Em Up

I like them just as is, but dipping in extra marinara is a classic move. My youngest insists on ranch (kids are weird). Perfect with a big salad, or, if it’s movie night, just pass ‘em around on a platter.

Stuff I’ve Learned (So You Don’t Have To)

Don’t try rushing the dough. I once skipped the kneading and got lumpy pockets. Regret!
Adding loads of sauce feels right but will absolutely leak everywhere. Just don’t.
Preheating the oven makes a difference, but on one lazy evening, I didn’t — they still cooked, just flatter. Not the end of the world.

Questions People (Actually) Ask Me

Can I freeze these? Yep! Freeze before baking, then bake them straight from the freezer; just add 4–5 extra minutes (I’ve defrosted them before too, but texture’s a bit off).
Is this dough gluten-free? Not as written, but I’ve made it with gluten-free flour blends; it still works. Turns out a bit denser, FYI.
Can I use beef or tofu? You do you! Both are great. Actually, pressed tofu tosses in brilliantly.
How do you get the crust so golden? Little egg wash trick above. Or olive oil works alright.
What if I don’t have Greek yogurt? Sour cream or skyr is fine. Or check this handy Greek yogurt swap guide from Serious Eats if you’re truly in a bind.
Where can I find good pizza sauce? I actually like Rao’s or just follow Sally’s recipe here when feeling ambitious.

Totally random but if you ever find yourself craving a hot pocket for Breakfast: cold, with a cup of strong coffee, is oddly brilliant. I discovered that by accident (slept through the alarm, what can you do?), and regret nothing.